Is God Welcome In Your Home?

Is God welcome in your home? I dont mean philosophically, but rather, is it permissable to talk about God in a safe way? Can you make yourself vulnerable- and can your children make themselves vulnerable- in order to risk expressing themselves and their thoughts and feelings about God?

In my family of origen, you did not DARE talk about God because you would be criticized, challenged, laughed at, and treated as a superstitious fool. It was only a few years ago, at age 30-something, that I understood this to be a form of neglect at best, but really, abuse. Withholding spirituality from a child- or worse, abusing the child's spirituality, is a horrible offense. But I suspect it happens a lot.

One must become vulnerable in order to talk about deep, inward, spiritual experiences and thoughts. If mom and dad are not safe people to be vulnerable with, you quickly learn to shut that side of yourself off. I certainly did.

Today, at mass, a young seminarian, Deacon Lukas who will be fully ordained this spring, asked us if our families were safe places to discuss God. Could we pray together at home? What fitting questions for Holy Family Sunday! I am sure I am doing a better job than my parents did. But I want to be conscious of any bad habits or responses I have from my childhood.

On a side note DH's mother attended mass with us this morning. It was nice. We dont see each other often, as there is some... history.... with DH and his mother. She is, however, thrilled beyond measure that we are attending the church and due for confirmation/baptism/first communion in two months. DH has had all the sacraments having been raised Catholic. Our marriage will be validated soon as well.

I suspect MIL has said her share of prayers for us over the past 16 years. If I can thank her for one thing, it will be that. I dont know what graces have come our way due to her prayers.

And, it was such a treat to hear the readings and commentaries of the priests on family. My previous church, which I still support to small degree, was sadly unwelcoming to families. Oh, they did all the 'right' things; had a great Sunday school program, and smiled painfully at the children in the hallways. But they segregate children at coffee hour, give them dirty looks during the service, and have even banned the children from several services. After finding out that the church supported a non-profit service that financed abortions, I could no longer deny the message I was getting. Children are seen as unwanted, inconvenient, and to some, downright bad. I had even been told, to my face, by several members, that having more than one or two children was wrong, and that breastfeeding should be 'illegal' in our church.

OI!

Anyway- sorry for the vent- at the Catholic church today, I heard the most wonderful comments about children and families. Parents are the primary, most imporant, and most influential educators in their children's lives. Children are precious gifts. Children remind us of Jesus' life as a child, and Mary and Joseph had the same problems and joys we have. The whole time babies wailed and fussed, and people just smiled and on occasion laughed. I know there are crotchety folk in the Catholic church too. It is just that a main tenant of the church is to love and treasure children. And in my former church the tenant was to decide whether or not a child is something that is either bad and unwanted, or wanted and bad. Sigh.